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Saturday, 3 September 2016

A Very Blunt Letter To The President By CharlyBoy

Mr President Sir,

I trust that this meets you well.
I know it has not been easy since you came on board, so many wahalas,
so much yawa, frustration and hopelessness.
First rule of leadership: everything is your fault.
Sir, Nigerians are surely dying and, quickly.
They can no longer see the light, they feel the Heat.

The welfare of the common man must be your top priority henceforth or God forbid, Nigeria and Nigerians will die in your hands.
Since you assumed office as President of Nigeria, there has been a remarkable dissonance within your government. I wonder who is in charge.

Sometimes I wonder whose thoughts you’re thinking or whose agenda you’re executing; while at other times, I wonder if you are held hostage by the gangsters called The Cabal.
Can you say you are oblivious of the hardship and suffering we all are going through?
I remember two years ago when I visited the Aso villa, then occupied by your predecessor. During our discussion and my lamentation about the nigerian youths I was not particularly shocked by a reaction that seemed like one throwing both hands in the air and saying “Charly, I am held hostage here, I am surrounded by enemies”.Sir, are you the one in charge or like your predecessor, are you being held hostage by the cabals and obnoxious sycophants, so much so that our plight and cries as Nigerians are none of your concern?
Na wa o, this is certainly not the change we thought you promised or do we just assume that your words don’t mean much?

Oga mi, abegi check the matter, you cannot ignore the five percent of voters who did not vote for you but whose resources the country depends on as alarm don blow, to cater for the 97 percent who voted for you. This kind “one chance” is sending a wrong signal to the whole country. Sometimes I just wonder how things can function properly when the formation and the foundation of the ruling party is not based on any sound ideology, but on frustration, bitterness, divisive politics and a gathering of strange bedfellows. Kai!!!

Presido, this your war on corruption, is somehow o.
Need I say that corruption is not only about stealing funds, it is also about putting bad people in prime positions who have neither the passion nor the qualification to do the bloody job. This form of corruption is crippling Nigeria, meeeen!!!
As I scan through your ministries and key positions, I wonder how come it is full of village friends with the qualification to the post is just to be a clan member.
When leaders, out of fear, realize that their lack of capacity could have consequential effects, they resort to nepotism to protect self.It should be a terrible thing to look over your shoulder when you are trying to lead, especially if you don’t know who and who is just washing you. Na so.
My people, simple and short, fear dey catch me for the future of our country.

I know that there is no vaccine against mismanagement/incompetence. Most Naijas may have concluded that the CHANGE mantra was only 419. There is great fear in the land, most people are not sure where the country is headed, and what many Nigerians are asking is whether you feel us, your subjects, if you feel our plight at all.I see so many of my people walking with their heads dangling over their shrinking shoulders, being swept by hunger and poverty in the land of plenty. God are you there?
My people are desperate for someone to believe in, Nigerians needs a Talk and Do Presido, no go-slow for the matter because many things don scatter. We certainly need someone who practically leads us through this pain with sincere action and not mere intents or words.
I don talk my own.
Best Regards

Oga Pastor, That One Na Missyarn - Charlyboy Replies Pastor Adeboye

Adeboye 12:18:00 No comments:

For the past few days, pastor Adeboye’s advice to youths on marriage have been trending all over the place. I suspect that the good pastors yarns tells me that he is a man suspended in time, between old and new school. Don’t get it twisted, in as much as I flow with his definition of a good woman, from his statement I see that the obvious way to his heart is through his stomach and of cause through prayers.

Good, No wahala.

However our amiable pastor rubs it in when he starts to yarn Akpata, ” Marry a warrior, if a girl cannot pray for one hour, don’t marry her. Don’t marry a girl who is lazy, who cannot cook. She needs to know how to do chores and cook because you cannot afford to eat out at all times” Hummm na wa! Really? Seriously?

So if my wife to be can’t rant, chant, shout and generally carry on as a prayer warrior, praying for a whole hour, the woman doesn’t deserve a wife status. Abi?

Oga pastor, that one na missyarn. Over praying does not make one a better husband or wife, because the world especially Naija is filled with Fake people and “Fakest” pastors. Does a man having a job guarantee that he will make a good husband? Does a woman knowing how to cook guarantee she will make a good wife? Haba.Ok I get it, The Nigerian god has an ear infection, so we must shout and pray for hours because that’s the only way he may listen to our prayers, right? I know that a man is suppose to marry a helper and not a cook or a house girl. By the way, is anything wrong with encouraging your young male congregation to learn how to cook and do chores too.

“Do not marry a worldly lady” what the heck does that mean? Is it about being materialistic or just being fashionable, looking nice. I guess in your book we can’t be a good Christian if we got swagg and we are trendy. Judge not pastor. We must all not look like Deeper Life people to have a personal relationship with God. By the way, if you want to start writing your own commandment you may as well write your own version of the bible for your congregation. Na una way.Being married should never define a man or a woman. Marriage in a few years anyways, will be out of fashion. Being married is only nice if we are lucky to pick a partner who will be our friend, if not, that maybe hell on earth. All of us must not get married if our threshold for nonsense and garbage is low. The world is obviously changing and we are no longer in the 60s. Who wants to be suffering and smiling. Most importantly marriage should not be a milestone for anyone. Yes o.

Men-O-Pause By Charly Boy

Adeboye 13:53:00 No comments:

If you are above 40yrs old, then you have every business reading this. If not however, you still need to go ahead and read because your own time dey come.

I mostly talk about the experiences I have been through, to talk to me and some times to heal me or some of the people I counsel. I share things I have learnt, so others can pick any positives that may help them in their journey through life.

Na so.

The stage I am at now and what am going through, is what I have discussed with so many men including my father-in-law in the past 30yrs. I never thought or even imagined I would one day be wearing the same shoes myself.

Some men right now are experiencing symptoms that include fatigue, serious mood swings, depression and wait for it....sexual problems; like not being as desirous of your spouse sexually as you have been in the past. Like noticing things you didn't use to notice in the past in your house hold. Like being irritable and short fused or the feeling of being alone even when you're surrounded by family.

Oyinbo people get name for am, dem dey call am Men-O-Pause.

When a woman is moody, it's hormones. When a man is moody, it's work related stress, money problems, or just one of those days, right?

Maybe not!

An increasing amount of evidence points to an aging-related hormonal change in men that corresponds to the hormonal change in women known as menopause. Some call it "male menopause" which some believe is not entirely accurate but still gets the point across.

Much the same way women's estrogen levels drop after a certain age, men's testosterone levels decrease with age.

Testosterone is also known as androgen, and many doctors prefer the term "andropause" for this male condition or mid-life crisis, but all na the same pausing.

Anything wey pause, dey on hold.

So for many husbands, their sex life with their spouse is on hold. For some, this has been on hold for weeks, months and even years. Wahala dey o.

According to my research, testosterone decreases very gradually, in the area of 1 percent per year starting around age 35, don't take my word for it, go ask your doctor or go read it up. So Na him be say my own don decrease by 30%? Kai!!!! See life.

Some of the symptoms are remarkably similar to those experienced by women in menopause, including moodiness, fatigue, thinking too much, depression, decreased sex drive. Hummm, my brothers, old age no fit hide sha, no matter the charlyboy in us.

So how do you know if your symptoms are related to Mid-life crisis/Menopause or to some other condition?

All I can tell you is to take a trip to the doctor.

My guy, this life funny o. See me, see menopause. Tufiakwa. I reject it in Jesus Name!

Now if you are the wife, there are a few things you can do to try and help get your husband back to the way he used to be before this sudden turn of events.

First, understand what you're dealing with, both of you should see a doctor together.

It is not always correct for wives to allege that their husbands are not getting their sex games on due to escapades with a mistress. For some wives, they say fuck it, and find themselves a handy man.

Meanwhile, this is one of those times in a man's life when his wife "should be" very sensitive and go further to research on the topic especially in these days of Internet.

Wives must help out by making extra effort not only to be sexy but to be the gentle aggressor in this time of need.

There are treatments for these conditions so partners must be open to talk about it.

Wives, what you never want to do is sit there and do nothing cause that will surely become the death of sex in your relationship.

But if you're already getting your groove on somewhere else, never mind.

Most men may have problem with going to see a doctor and actually dealing with their problems, so the wife may have to find a way around that but, rest assured that seeking help will be more than worth it in order that both of you begin to feel jiggy again and better controlling the mood swings and other symptoms.

Na so I know reach o, Men...Ohhhh...Pause!!!

Charly Boy Pens Open Letter To Buhari

Adeboye 04:33:00 No comments:

Mr. President Sir,

Once again I am compelled to voice out my bewilderment at the stumbling and wobbly kind of governance we have had since you came onboard.
I wonder what you are doing right now.
I wonder if our tears, pains and hopelessness affect you in anyway.
I wonder if you are the one in charge or some other people.

You have tasted leadership before and you know what it entails. I understand that. However, then and now are two different scenarios, two separate dispensations.

We know you.
We know about your war against indiscipline.
We hear about your no-nonsense stand against corruption.
We have read so much about our stolen monies which you have managed to recover. Well done sha.
Meanwhile, the nagging questions that leave me sleepless most nights remain unanswered…

How much money have you collected from the looters so far?
To what use have the monies been put?

From where I stand, it seems you’re the only one in your cabinet fighting corruption while your praise singers are busy washing you all over town trying to convince us that you’re a good man.
I, CharlyBoy, know that you are a “good” man: someone who loves the country, a patriot with a high sense of morals perhaps. But na that one we go chop? Is that all that is needed to fix the rot of over 40yrs.?
I don’t think so!

To a great degree, Nigeria has become a terribly dysfunctional society.
I didn’t vote in the last elections because I just tire with the kalokalo leadership so far. Even when a lot of people wanted change, I wondered what manner of change could come when in our history we never really struggled for anything.
Before you sat on that chair, I proclaimed that Nigeria would only survive under a benevolent dictator; one with lots of selfless love for the country and is willing to lay down his life, one who would deal mercilessly with all those who have ruined our land.
A lot of people thought I was talking about you.

From Boko Haram to Niger Delta Avengers. MASSOB, OPC, to Biafran Avengers, name it, the list is endless.
Mr President Sir, you ought to, as a matter of urgency, review your approach to handling issues because, sometimes diplomacy works better. Excessive force will only breed more discontentment. Take it from me.
Your mark of fair play must cut across board, you must not leave room for us to second-guess your intentions biko, and you must at all times convey clarity of purpose.
It is not possible (or I should say it is unbelievable) that you can’t see that we are swimming in the river of chaos.
It is funny because, those who feel insulated and protected by the State will discover that they are mere sitting ducks!
Just because say boys dey vex!

Putting Nigeria together will take a lot more than childish, nonsensical propaganda.
It will take more than prayers, more than just being a good guy.
Being good is important but not as important as being a no-nonsense ass-kicker; person wey no send, because many things don scatter.
I don’t care if you’re trying to convert all of us to Islam, I don’t care if everyone in your cabinet is your in-law, brother, sister, tribesman, cook, steward or even your MaiGuard.

On behalf of all the frustrated youths in this country, all we need is a leader who can fix things, not the one that comes with excuses.
A leader who is not afraid to admit that he has no clue to certain matters but willing to learn spot on and hands on.
A leader who can’t be comfortable with praise singers.
A leader who is troubled by the cry of poverty-ridden Nigerians.
A leader who can raise our hope once again in our battered country.
A leader who can make us start believing in our Nigeria again.

Oga Presido, do sometin o, boys are vexing!