Once upon a time, dance didn’t seem like what anyone would proudly announce as a profession. Most parents were likely to have reprimanded any child “silly” enough to dance for a living to look for a respectable job. It’s thanks to individuals like Kaffy (Kafaya Oluwatoyin Shafau-Ameh) that the perception has changed dramatically. The mother of three tells DGossip247.com what it felt like making the Guinness World Records and how motherhood changed her life.
Dance as a livelihood
“I just had the faith that whatever I decided to become in life would be important to me and the people around me. I believe that the importance to people around gave me fame; it is not because I tried to be popular. I communicate and I have direct contact with people who can practically say what I have done for them or do with them makes them happy. That is what spreads the word.”
No dull moment as a child
Growing up, she explains that there was no conscious effort to be the most popular girl in town even though she was always the centre of attention. She simply describes her path in life as sheer destiny. At Chrisland, Opebi, in Lagos, where she had her primary education, she was often in the middle of activities such as inter-house sports, Red Cross, dance competitions, literary and debating society and drama.
“I represented my school’s literary and debating society, JETS Club and I was always involved with events during inter-house sports. I had always excelled at physical activities. So, I think it is nature taking its course.”
Dance With Peter
For Kaffy, Dance With Peter reality television show is a dream come true because it is something she was hoping to put out by herself before Peter told her about it. So she reasoned that rather than repeating the same thing she felt it would bring in more value when two strong people with a strong passion came together.
“So, it is Peter’s thing, but it is our dream to see dancers and the profession being celebrated. I am happy that Dance With Peter is on because it is changing lives. You could see yourself from the production; this is the first season and it has already gathered a lot of followership. It feels like people have been waiting for something like this to happen. I also know that the impact of Dance With Peter is not just for dancers; it would inspire everyone.”
Life as a dancer Kaffy
insists that being a dancer is not as easy as people think. According to her, it is simply not all about moving the body; dancing requires a lot of discipline, intelligence and prowess and it changes lives as well. “Trust me, I have used dance to reform a lot of young people. I have used it to change girls from sleeping around with men.
I was able to make them know that they could make a livelihood from being a good dancer. Though some of them still indulge in that, a lot of them now know their worth. Also, I know boys who were jobless but dance changed their lives. I made them feel important and I gave them responsibilities. I feel it is self-worth that makes people do good or bad.
If your self-worth is high there is a good chance that you would not do certain things. Dance helped me to be a great child despite all odds and that explains why the government should support dance centres because the centres can help groom children to be better dancers, instead of involving in crimes,” she said. Also, she believes that dance speaks to the soul given that it comes from the mind. “Music speaks with us and the movement helps us to release those energy.”
Training the young Kaffy
has an academy where she trains young boys and girls. She says the experience has been a mixture of good and bad. But the urge to help others remains undying regardless. Explaining further why she can’t stop passing skills to people, she notes that she sees what she does as a divine calling.
“It might be tough or terrible but it is God’s gift and at the end of the day it is about trying to help people to be better. But sometimes people get it twisted. After helping people to a certain level, they would suddenly develop the mindset that they are better or bigger than you and they would rub it in your face.
Most of them even forget that the only reason I am helping is for them to be a better version, but they allow that to get into their heads. I expect them to do better that me, but it would be bad if you use that against me, the person who taught you. I think that is an area most young people get it wrong and it happens almost in all sectors, including music.”
She says people should realise that whatever they do to others would surely be requited. “So, it is law of karma. I became a mother before I had my kids; I used to house a lot of dancers. At a time, I had like 20 dancers staying with me and I have had a lot experiences with such situation. I regretted many times, but I had to gather strength to see ways I can still impact because I feel there has to be someone I can help,” she said passionately.
Despite the failure of some people who passed through her tutelage to admit that she had played a big role in their early stages, she says she sees them regularly deploying the same skills she taught them in putting their dance schools together. “That alone gives me happiness and satisfaction because I don’t need to make noise that I was involved in the development of anyone. To me, it means they are doing well and actually listened to all those things I told them,” she adds.
Releasing a dance DVD
Kaffy argues that she is the first who introduced dance to fitness in Nigeria even as she acknowledges that many people in the pubic didn’t know it. She says she began that 10 years ago. “I started dance to fitness when people were not too into workout and didn’t see reasons to be into it.
Since I was a dancer I thought of adding that dance flavour into it and it became poplar, something everyone started embracing. I started taking people on classes and the interest to be part of the classes grew.” The reason she came up with Ijoda, a workout DVD released mid-this year, was spurred by the realisation that Africans tend to create things and allow others to take the credit. She laments the near absence of platform to sell ideas, rather than simply joining the trend. “Though there’ve been influx of western culture to a higher degree, we should still see ourselves in whatever we do.
So, the thought of doing something for Africa and selling it to other parts of the world made me invest in Ijoda, which means where is the dance? Or dance is good.” Immediately she conceived the idea of having a dance DVD, Kaffy went after concepts that she thinks would set it apart from the rest.
I toured United Kingdom first, then I went to America where I did five states. It was stressful because I had my two kids with me; I was still breastfeeding my little girl and I had my boy to look after too. And everywhere we went to, people didn’t hide their likeness for Nigerian music. When I came back to the country, I then shot the DVD which took four different productions.
I spent over 50 million naira on it, including travel expenses. We had to do a lot of cancelling and adjusting to finally arrive at what we have now. We are yet to do the mass product of which I know most people are waiting for. We just want to keep the quality high for now, even though there are plans to release a cheaper version for everyone to conveniently buy. Putting out the DVD is an ongoing project as it is; it is not a one-off thing,” she explained.
Marriage and its challenges
When Kaffy decided to marry Joseph Ameh, a drummer with PSquare, there was so much drama in the air especially in relation to her age and family. Kaffy is like eight years older than her husband, an experience that does not quite sit well in this clime. She however says marriage has given her more strength than she ever thought she had.
While pointing out that she is a stronger person now, she emphasised that marriage is a tough institution especially when the couples are young people aspiring to be something in life. “As a working mum with a handsome and young husband, it is not easy.
When I go to events he feels like a man is looking at me and he goes to shows I feel like a lady is looking at him. And at home there is always the effect of that. We had our first son before we got married and there was issue with the family before things got together.”
Sad memories
She is not surprised with the challenges that come with marriage and motherhood. Kaffy started to shoulder responsibilities at the age of 11 when her parents went their separate ways. Though she was raised in London with her siblings, things got bad at a point when her parents returned to Nigeria.
Her father was an automobile dealer while her mother had a large boutique. Her parents were wealthy until they started experiencing a decline in fortune culminating in a divorce. “I had to take care of my younger ones; let me just put it that I have always been a mum since I was tender.
So, marriage is not a task for me because I was already prepared for the challenges. If I didn’t go through that as a young person I would probably have failed woefully in my marriage because being married is not easy. We should always celebrate and appreciate couples who are still happily in marriage for many years, especially when they are into entertainment. It takes a lot, but I thank God for my family, husband and my amazing children who have been my strength and helpers?”
Guinness Book of Records
Dancing for several hours is indeed a herculean feat that would require sufficient grit to accomplish. But for Kaffy, dancing her way into the Guinness World Records in 2006 was not by her power; she would rather ascribe it to God. “I was looking for an opportunity to be someone and God gave me the opportunity and I took it. It was never planned. I danced for about 54 hours, but the official record time was 53 hours and 43 minutes.”
